I stare at the entrance and the person I wanted to avoid the most is here. She is arrived here with her whole family- her parents, brothers, aunts, and uncles including her 4 cousins.

My cousin Olivia and I were very close friends when we were little, but we had a huge fight that severed our friendship. My sisters know about the fight that happened between us and avoid Olivia for my sake.

Since Olivia and her family live in another state, I normally don’t see them unless it a quinquereme, baptism or etc. Normally, whenever I’m at these parties I’m reminded how big my family is. I learned from both my parents that in Mexico they grew up with more than 5 siblings and including the generation before them.

The families over years have stayed in touch and it always blows my mind when my mom and dad remind me and my sisters how we are related to one another. Whenever there a big event in our family, every family member even those from different state

“Mira a tu primo aqui de Nueva Jersey. Digamos hola a ellos” My mom said. My parents don’t know about the incident between us.

I get up from my seat as well as my sister did. As I start walking the first thing, I noticed is the music. The music is always loud, and no one can hear unless you yell even if that person is right in front of you. I see that DJ is always at the stage to play music and at the corner at the stage are the Disco party lights and two larger speakers at the end of the stage.

I see several small kids are running around the floor playing games with one another. I know that in small corner of the left side of the room the adults- usually my aunts are setting up or preparing to serve the food for the guest. The tables and chairs are on either side of the room, so people can use the center of the room to dance around.

My family and I make arrive to their tables and we greet them. I greet the adults, and my cousins until I reach Olivia.

“Hi” I said as I extend my hand to my cousin.

“Hi” Olivia said back as she shook my hand.

Underneath the glow of a vacant street lamp, trash rots beneath her nose. Through the simple act of turning a page, the autumnal air is fumigated of all sour scents. She sits reading line by line the tale of a man and a woman not far from here, though years and realities apart from her own.

Eyes down.

Focus here.

Glance up there.

The ensembles of men and women walk amidst her glance– not far from here.

Why do their eyes never fall upon my own?

A young man and woman, near tight embrace. Four-wheeled fanatics. Huddles surrounding smoke and empty bottles. To each their own, and her… On my own.

She returns to the page. It is different now. The focus has faded. The fumes linger beneath her nose. She sits reading line by line, the tale of a man and a wom—

“Excuse me, miss.”

Oh, how I wish you’d go away.

Her cheeks simmer vermillion. His cheeks wear a coat of scruff and sweat. His eyes, glazed, fall upon her own.

“Excuse me miss, but you are really pretty.”

Oh, how I wish you’d go away. The inebriation wears no mask. 

“Um, thank you.”

“No, you’re like, really pretty.”

Hands to the lips. A look of utter disbelief. His right foot stumbles over the left, forgetting it occupied the same earth.

“And you’re, real?”

Does he know, even the ‘pretty ones’ read?

“Yes, I am real…”

“I mean, you’re sitting there, in front of my eyes. You’re real?”

Now, what might this man be on?

“Yes, yes I am.”

She shuffles in her seat as he stumbles backward and forwards. The face of shock still staring at her own.

“Woah, and you exist?”

“And I exist.”

“Wow.”

“Wow, woah (and whatnot)…Well, miss, have a good night.”

“And you, too.”

He staggers down the path. A glass bottle in his right coat pocket shimmers beneath the vacant street lamp, momentarily catching the eye of the young ‘miss.’

Must be the pregame.

Those words linger here. On her tongue.

And I exist.

Eyes down.

Focus here.

It is different now. Will it ever be the same? The lines are still the same. The tale of a man and a woman not far from here. She feels not far from here. But eyes down. Focus here.

She reads line by line. She sits beneath the vacant street lamp. And she exists.